Wednesday 22 June 2011

Lobola

As a result of lobola (bride price) most parents nowadays force their daughters into unwanted marriages which soon result in divorce. Sometimes the parents force their daughters because they want to reduce their big families. I think these mothers are aware of how expensive it is to divorce.

I once heard a woman saying that she had been forced to marry a man who promised her parent’s fat lobola. After some months she divorced and her parents were asked to return the money they had been paid as lobola

It can be better if a man can be allowed to pay lobola voluntarily because they see it as they are buying a woman. Women are treated as property to be exchanged. This result in women and girls suffering from violence like beatings because of lobola paid for them. At times it is difficult to come out of the brutal marriage because she is depending on the husband for a living.

 Because of  lobola women tend to lose all their rights. They cannot do anything on their own, the husband will always control. They cannot even go back to their parents as they will return them to their husbands because they cannot afford to pay back the price. It has been shared among the relatives.

Nowadays people prefer to cohabit because of the high bride price. The rate of HIV infections is alarming as young girls look for sugar daddies to give them money to help their boyfriends to pay for their bride price

Reforming from the practice of bride price will reduce violence that many women suffer because of the price related customs. The parents do take the price but when the marriage fails the woman is supposed to pay back her husband alone. This led to poverty on her side as she had to raise that money on her own.

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